Hello and welcome if you are new to, from the desk of Rachel Leeke!
And welcome back if you already know your way around the place.
This newsletter is where I share weekly observations on two important forces in my life: love + travel.
In addition to narratives, I provide tools to support you in creating the confident, loving, and adventurous life you deserve.
Read up on my last newsletter, where I shared thoughts while en route to D.C. here or the entirety of my work here.
A little context:
I overextended myself this weekend and every. single. time. I do that I pay for it.
Reality is a potent and stiff drink to swallow, but it is the only landscape in which truth is revealed.
I surrender to what is and have decided to no longer push against the wind.
I am not in control.
I have no say if it rains,
if it is sunny or if hail decides to fall
crushingly from the sky
I am not in control.
The mountains may crumble
The sea may reclaim the land
The valley may crack and fold and swallow
us whole
I am not in control.
I follow the path of a butterfly with my eye
It flaps and dips and swerves and lands
No path chartered outside of its being
I am not in control.
Should the atmospheric pressure rise
And anatomy stays the same
Will bones shatter under the weight of unfulfilled dreams
Or will the heightened psi fracture the form first
I am not in control.
Where there's a heavy empty space
I am not required to fill it with my magic
My name is not plaster
And it is not my penance to mend what is betrayed
I am not in control.
The tree sheds its leaves
The snake sheds its skin
Baby teeth fall
and intuition guides their first steps
I am not in control.
I cannot
force, cajole, or motivate someone
to seek healing no matter how much I see them hurt
No matter how much I hurt
I am not in control.
The song sparrow trills and
Electrifies the air
Its value self-evident
Not hidden from view or questioned
Holding a mirror for the self-aware
I am not in control.
Shrinking does no benefit
It will not chisel out cancer from DNA
The ravaged seek blood as proof of life
Theirs or the other
Any evidence of still being here
I am not in control.
I have no say over others' choices
and directions
and ambitions in life
So, I will not extend my back
a bridge for their feet
in search of closing the gap
between reality and my hopes and dreams.
—
I wish you a week of ease, joy and abundance.
I love you,
RL
The book “All About Love” by bell hooks provides guidance, direction, and spiritual fulfillment for me.
The definition of love that she utilizes came by way of social psychologist Erich Fromm.
It states that love is “the will to extend one's self for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth."
She goes on and details :
“To truly love we must learn to mix various ingredients - care, affection, recognition, respect, commitment, and trust, as well as honest and open communication.”
If you find value in my offerings, would like to tangibly support my work, but, are unable to commit to a subscription at this time, consider buying me a coffee or purchasing a book for my library.
LET ME KNOW:
Have you ever set yourself on fire to keep others warm?
How do you manage overwhelm? What’s your aftercare when you realize you’ve descended into it?
Do you utilize a different definition of love?
What makes you feel most powerful and embodied?
I write about my inner world as a form of healthy expression. Here’s more on the topic:
-Reasons I write
-Guests in my home
-Choosing connection over perfection
-On seeing the unseen
I should be asleep, but after spending most of the day finishing my next essay I found myself wired. I really love this poem because it reminds me to release, it reminds me that i am not in control, I don't have to be the hero that saves the day, I can just be. Thank you!
. . . ."Have you ever set yourself on fire to keep others warm?" . . . no, but i once had a girlfriend who said i was her personal space heater :)